Bigger Than  A Breadbox
by obsessionpersonified
Summary: Red was the biggest thing she'd ever seen, with the biggest THING she'd ever seen. It was a monster! It was like Mount Everest, wearing Mount Fuji as a cap. Her mind stuttered to a halt.      NOT EXCPECTED NOT EXPECTED!


A/N: Kay, this is based on the Movies, and has nothing to do with the comics. I just felt the need to write it. Yes, Liz is a little OOC, but come on, either I made her a little out of character, or I replaced her with a cardboard cutout. The acting would have been the same, according to the movie.

Sheesh

I do not own Hellboy, Who Framed Roger Rabbit or any other thing mentioned in this fiction, which was made purely for my sick enjoyment and receives no money in its making.

Bigger Than A Breadbox

Okay, Elisabeth Sherman was NOT a stranger to the penis. So sure, she didn't see penis that often, they were really more like 'passing acquaintances' but she wasn't completely ignorant of its existence. She'd had a lover… or two. The time when she was sixteen in the closet with Billy Buckhouse did not count, and nothing could convince her otherwise. The point was that she'd seen penises before. She knew what they did, how they did it, and was NOT in any way shape or form afraid of them.

It was that damn night in Moscow! If she could just erase that from her mind, than she could get over this silly fear and get to making the monkey with the Big Guy.

The night was etched into her mind. It was before she left, and she was wandering the hall of the BPRD Russia, driven from her bed by nightmares. She remembered exactly what she was wearing, some ridiculous nightgown the professor had given her, all white lawn and shapeless. Come to think of it, he might have foreseen the coming storm. Red wasn't big on subtlety

In any case she was idling along, thinking cooling thoughts, and came to the decision she was going to visit Red. He was usually up at all hours, reading, or working out or building those strange, but effective, bullets of his. He was always good for a laugh, if not exactly the most calming person around. He made her burn in a most peculiar, not-gonna-explode-but IMPLODE way.

She found herself not too far away, her unconscious mind already making the decision for her. The path to Red's double bolted door was a common theme for her, and her feet took to it naturally. The big metal door was ajar; obviously Red was expecting her, or some other company. Liz was guessing herself, as very few people aside from her, or the professor actually SOUGHT Red out. Most people just bumped into him, and quickly regretted it. She smiled fondly, Red was the intimidating type.

Liz slipped into the room and was surprised when the familiar giant red form wasn't in sight. It was only after a thump that she realized he must be in the bathroom. A mischievous smile slipped over her lips.

The shower was running.

Red disliked the cold, he always had. It didn't harm him, no, very little did in fact HARM Hellboy, but he was always grouchier when winter came along. She wondered, what he'd do if suddenly drenched with icy cold water?

The BPRD in Russia had infamously shady plumbing. More than one poor agent had gotten the icy edge of that particular blade. It would take only a second, one brief flush of the toilet, and a weeks worth of laughs as a reward. Briefly, very briefly, she felt awkward about possibly seeing Red in the buff. The brief moment passed when she envisioned his as he usually was, sans shirt. She'd seen that wonderful chest often enough, maybe it was time to see more. What better excuse to sneak a peek than when performing a masterful prank?

Shoeless, she crept to the bathroom, stealthily opened the door, and gauged the distance to the toilet, and then the shower fully intent on her task and-

Whoa

Whoa

…wow.

Elizabeth Sherman was frozen, hidden behind the bathroom door, all thoughts of pranks, toilets and cold water behind her. Her mind slowly catalogued.

Red was naked. Expected.

Red was all wet. Expected (and bonus!)

Red was hard. Not expected.

Red was huge.

Colossal.

More than adequate for his size.

Red was the biggest thing she'd ever seen, with the biggest THING she'd ever seen. It was a monster! It was like Mount Everest, wearing Mount Fuji as a cap. Her mind stuttered to a halt.

NOT EXCPECTED NOT EXPECTED!

Her eyes began to water, her heart began to beat fast, and her stomach flew to her throat when he slid his stone hand up the shower wall, and the other hand down his chest to cup himself at the base. She should stop. She should go…er… away. And be away. For a while. A long, long while. This was wrong, so very, very wrong. On top of that it was an invasion of privacy. She needed to leave, and absorb Red's…. mightiness… alone for a couple days.

Hellboy began a smooth, slow stroke.

She leaned further in ever so slightly, rapt. Her eyes lifted up, reluctantly, from his impressive cock, and skidding over his amazing water dripping chest, to focus on his face. She felt suddenly embarrassed, far more so than when she was watching him jerk off. His eyes were closed, his brow furrowed, and his lips curled ever so slightly. As she watched the concentration on his face deepen, his smooth up and down became faster.

She had no idea how long she stood there, mesmerized by Hellboy's equipment and 'O' face, but it was long enough for her leg to cramp in protest. Then, as she surfaced from her daze, came the final, mitigating factor. Red began bearing his teeth, with a deep groan that sent warmth rushing through her and pooling between her legs, and then he whisper her name.

Her name.

'Liz', all husky and needy, filled with longing and desire. The little, one syllable pet name set her heart racing almost painfully in her chest, made so wet she could feel herself on her thighs, and scared the ever living crap out of her.

She turned and fled, back out of the room, out of the hall and into her bed, where her pulse throbbed between her legs like a wound, and where she began the fear, this terror, that kept her from Hellboy's arms, love and most specifically, his bed. The naked WANT in his voice, the possession in his tone was scary enough, but the fact that the 'standing ovation' was in honor of merely the thought of her? THAT was intimidating.

Liz never wanted to be anybody's anything, let alone one person's everything.

Back to the present, Elizabeth, she warned herself, as she dodged through a door when Hellboy appeared at the end of the hall.

Damn that man, and damn his saving her life from that crazy demon-dealing bastard.

Damn that KISS.

She could still feel it on her lips, that fiery, flaming kiss that burnt her up the way her anger and fear never could. That kiss that seared away the cold, made her feel whole and free, and SAFE. In Hellboy's arms, nothing could touch her.

Damn that too.

Why couldn't Meyers have owned those lips?

Liz flicked her hand to be rid of the flames that came so easily to her fingers when she though of THAT kiss. Too much, too much, and not enough. That was another thing. Red was fireproof. FIREPROOF. She could burn and he wouldn't burn. They could burn together. God, what a blaze that would make.

Impatiently, she flicked again, now the fire consumed her whole hand. After a moment it was gone. Hellboy was gone too.

She was safe. She was a coward. She was disgusted with herself.

Elisabeth was pissed.

Hellboy was pissed. His temper wasn't good at the best of times, and now it was fueled on pure frustration alone. He had convinced himself that Liz was out of his reach, that she wasn't ever going to be his, and then…

…that kiss.

Gods, he could still feel her burn, not on his skin, but under it. It hadn't ended, oh no, but burned steadily, hot and ready, and wanting. Oh, mercy, he WANTED. Every foreign instinct buried deep in his DNA rose up, wanting to get her, keep her, and hide her away as his and his alone. She returned the kiss, opened that particular door and there was no going back. She RETURNED his kiss. She accepted him. That was it.

Aw, Hell. He wasn't any good at this. This… emotional crap. He'd take a bullet for her, kill for her, and die for her. Hell, he'd condemn the entire world to unending torment for her and her alone. In fact, he almost did. Couldn't that be enough? In the movies the hero always got the girl. She would run up to him skirts, a-flying, throw herself into his arms and pledge her undying love.

Then they'd go and break the bed.

Well, he was only guessing about that last part. And wishing. God, was he wishing. He hadn't been this hard since that horrible stint a while back, after watching Rodger Rabbit during a particularly hard bout of his puberty.

Damn! What was he supposed to do? What could he do?

Wait.

And burn.

"I'm scared of your dick!" Liz growled at Hellboy.

There was a pause. Which went on for a long while.

Elizabeth had been beating herself up, over and over again. Why was she so afraid? She loved Red, she'd do anything for him. The emotion wasn't a problem anymore. Only the vague terror remained, a reoccurring emotion without a cause that stalled her our every time. She couldn't be a coward, not anymore. So, she began storming around the BPRD, looking for the red-skinned tormentor.

It took a while, so while she had a whole speech planned in her head, by the time she'd seen him alone she was so nervous what came out wasn't exactly too… tactful.

Elizabeth was a particularly becoming shade of fire-engine red while Hellboy stared at her.

"You're scared…" He repeated slowly, setting the can of beer down gently.

"…of your dick. Well, the idea of it." She sighed and just plowed through. In for a penny. "I spied on you once. You're… impressive. Hell, you're scary. You're passionate and sexy, and kind, and sweet but god Red, you're TOO MUCH."

He sat there for a moment, his heavy brow furrowed as he watched her. She honestly didn't know what he'd do, Red was an Action man. Demon. Whatever. He would want to DO something about a problem. What was there to be done about this though?

What he did nearly shocked her pants off.

"Tie me up."

"…what?" She asked confused. Did the object of her very fantasy asked to be tied down so that they could have sex?

"You're right. Liz, baby, I want you so bad I can't even see straight. I've been fighting all day to keep my hands off of you. If I took you, I'd take you hard. " His voice grew husky, and lust stabbed through Liz like a knife. His eyes were deep, and black, and hot, and locked with hers. "I'd take you hard and fast and I'd end up hurting you. I can guarantee it. I don't want to hurt you, baby. I'd never want to hurt you. So, tie me up. Good and tight. We'll take it slow, at your pace, and if you get scared, you can leave."

"You… you won't be mad?" She asked, tempted beyond all reasoning. Hellboy chuckled darkly.

"I'll be so enraged I'll scream but I wouldn't be mad at you." He came closer, crowding her, his big red body the perfect foil for her dark and light colors. "I want you Liz, more than anything. Be with me."

And that was it. Really, it was. When a huge, gorgeous demon stares down at your with sex-eyes and huskily asks you something like that, well, you really have no other options, do you? Liz drew in a shaky breath and nodded, but her movement to kiss him was stopped. She frowned at his stone hand, holding her away, before she met his gaze.

"Liz-Baby, you kiss me now and it's all over." He whispered huskily, his eyes going from hot and soft to dangerously hard. Like er… other parts of his body. "Let's get set up first."

Later. Later she'd be embarrassed about holding hands with Hellboy while he asked the nearest guard to bring him the thickest pair of shackles available in the biggest size. She would worry about those sly looks and chuckles when she wasn't being worshiped by a pair of dark, dark eyes and while the owner of said bedroom eyes wasn't rasping a calloused thumb over her fingers. She was rapt, entranced, and damn them all to hell anyway. Who were they to her? Nobody. Hellboy was all that mattered right now.

It wasn't too long at all, only an eternity before the chains arrived, and another few centuries to 'set up'. Hellboy wasn't helping; he took every opportunity to touch her, on the cheek, the neck, the arm, sliding a hand up her back, the curve of her hip, down her smooth thighs. By the time he was on the bed, arms firmly over his head ready to have the manacles snapped on, the only chains big enough for him, she was near to bursting.

She leaned over him, breasts brushing his hard chest. He deliberately breathed deep, so they crushed enticingly against him and he drew in another breath.

"Move quicker, baby." he hissed out. Liz obeyed, her hands shaking as they slid the bolts home. He strained his arms briefly, and the muscles bulged but the irons stayed still. He could probably bend the metal like tin if he really wanted to, she thought absently, and then banished the thought. A feast was laid out before her hungry eyes, and she was starved.

Liz was never one to begin slowly. Start as you intend to go, was her motto, so without delay she swung one leg over and planted herself firmly on that big, scary bulge beneath his too-sexy leather pants.

Hellboy hissed in a breath and thrust up immediately, and she heard the metal that bound him creak ominously for a moment. After a scary, exhilarating second where she doubted herself he reigned it in and settled, breathing as if he'd just went ten rounds with a tentacle-d prehistoric god. His eyes didn't beg her. They _commanded_ her. Liz had no choice but to obey.

She slid her hands up his chest, bare, because Hellboy practically never wore a shirt, and reveled in the hot hard play of muscle beneath her fingers. There was something about someone so blatantly MALE, it made her feel all soft and deliciously feminine inside. The feeling was a new one, but not entirely unwanted.

Once she reached his shoulders she leaned down, tried to avoid moving her hips, and kissed him again.

Finally.

They immediately went up in flames, and in a distant part of her mind she was grateful for the fireproof bedding they had sent for her. The iron manacles groaned with stress, but that became just part of the melody as flames crackled around her. Liz unconsciously began rocking against his hard cock, and he responded with a growl, an honest to god _growl,_ as he reciprocated. He broke away, gasping in pain.

"Liz, baby, if your gonna try this… its been _weeks_ since that kiss… baby, don't…"He stopped the whispered plea and rested his forehead against hers. "Baby, _please_."

Well, hell. Hellboy just said 'please'. That was rare. In fact, that was impossible. Liz was undoing her pants before she finished thinking. Before she started thinking really, because he was right. Weeks since that kiss, three weeks, four days, five hours and thirty-two minutes. _Weeks_, of foreplay. That was enough.

She shimmed out of the skin-tight black BPRD-issued work-out pants, which forced her to unseat herself, which was a tragedy itself, before pulling the tanktop off her body. Bra, gone. Socks, bye-bye. Panties, we knew thee well.

When she distractedly judged Red's face she began to doubt and fear reared its ugly head. He was so intense, staring at her with a look that said, 'Ownership' and such a hunger that it made her stomach drop. No one could actually _want_ a person that much… could they? Her insecurities floated up like bubbles, fragile, ethereal, and she wrapped her arms around her breasts to hide them from his coveting gaze.

"Red…" She moaned, lost and scared. She wanted his just as badly, but she couldn't deal with this! Too much too soon and it was drowning her and-

"No." He said and his voice was the darkest she'd ever heard. No joking, no pleading, not even an apology. This was a demon's voice. "Put your arms down, Elisabeth."

Her full name. Liz lowered her arms, savoring the velvety feeling of her full name of his tongue. He smiled, and it was a sharp, dangerous smile.

"Now, come here and finish what you started." The growled tones were so low they were almost below hearing range, but hear them she did, in the very marrow of her bones. Yes, she thought, and then obeyed. She didn't need to fear this, it was Red. He would never harm her.

But there was no way he or she would last through any kind of foreplay. With her fear and his want, they'd break something irreparable before they even got to the good part. Liz knew this was going to hurt. Why prolong it? Once this first, admittedly BIG step was taken she could enjoy Red at her leisure. And constantly. And forever.

Liz was reassured.

She climbed back up, her breast swaying as she straddled him again, this time lower. Their eyes remained locked as she unbelted him, unbuttoned him and lowered the zipper with a shushed rasp. He was just as big as she remembered, bigger if she thought about it so she didn't. Instead she reveled in the look in his eyes, in the heat of him in her hands.

A little maneuvering and he was at the threshold, the thick plum-like cap breeching her first, like a stretching and then, a pain. She gasped. God he filled her up, and so quickly. How would she ever… What on Earth was she thinking? He was enormous, this was impossible and-

-her watering eyes met his and on his face was a look like benediction. He looked at her as if she was a goddess. Liz lost what little breath she had, before she slid a little lower on his hard shaft. The pain made her wince.

"Red, I… I don't think I can…" She closed her eyes against his look... and then let out a cry when suddenly, shockingly, he was upright, the manacles were in pieces around them and he was inches deeper inside her. His big arms wrapped around her and his lips were at her throat and he was whispering. The words were mostly nonsense, interspersed with 'ohs' and 'baby's and 'please's and 'feel so good' and she was almost positive she heard his whisper 'worth every fucking minute of pain' but she couldn't be one hundred percent positive. At the same time he was rocking her, and little by little she was lowering further.

It burned, god it burned, but his big hands on her made the burn a not-so-bad thing. Then, in a twist, she felt the building ache of her orgasm, hard on approach and coming in quick and she gasped and rocked down when he rocked up.

The pain hit her in a burst as she felt his skin against her clit. The tears in her eyes were automatic, unconscious, because she was still riding the high. She had to come, it was just there and nothing was stopping it, and my god it was big, too big, like him, but she'd handled too big before hadn't she? Then it was on her and Liz's head flew back as she shook and trembled and spasmed around the cock buried deep inside her.

"Fuck!" Hellboy grunted and held her hips down as he thrust up in a short couple of jerks. The added sensation sent her spinning and he was powerless not to come as well, with her hot, tightness quivering around him. His teeth were bared and his hands were bruising her hips but Liz was beyond caring. She was beyond words.

She would be beyond tender in the morning but to hell with it.

To Hell with Mount Everest and his fucking Fuji cap to.

Liz, wrapped in Hellboys arms as they rested in the aftermath of the greatest orgasm probably in the history of the world, grinned a little.

"What are you thinking about?" Hellboy asked, his voice a husky whisper she'd grown to crave.

"Guess." She asked, resting her head on his chest. He laughed a little.

"Is it bigger than a breadbox?" He ventured. Liz laughed outright, then gave him a self-satisfied smile

"Sometimes."


End file.
